The vast majority of REALTORS are independent contractors. That means we don’t have a Human Resources (HR) Department overseeing us or giving us that annual training on harassment and bullying. While those in the corporate world dread the training and make fun of it, at least most of them know what bullying and harassment look like. Many REALTORS don’t seem to know.
In 2019, while serving as the Professional Standards Chair for the National Association of REALTORS (NAR), I was astounded at the number of phone calls, letters, and emails I received related to bullying and harassment.
No doubt members and staff reached out to me because they see this kind of behavior as unprofessional. It is. However, most examples of harassment and bullying are not something that is covered in our Code of Ethics.
For instance, if I think you’re cute and corner you in a conference room, the Code of Ethics doesn’t really cover that. Unless you can prove that my actions were due to your race, color, national origin, disability, sex, sexual orientation, gender identity, familial status, and/or religion, there is likely no Code of Ethics violation. That’s clearly not behavior that is encouraged in the Preamble but it’s also something we just assume the law and the markets will take care of. For the record, I don’t think the Code of Ethics should address harassment and bullying. The law and the marketplace should.
Bullying seems to be a problem primarily between REALTORS in the marketplaces. It seems some members believe that bullying is just a negotiation tactic. I’ll just stand right here and call BS on that.
NAR has an anti-harassment policy that applies to all members when serving in a volunteer position. So, there is some recourse when it happens in those situations. Beware, it also applies to situations where members mistreat staffers. If you’ve been harassing Association staff, shame on you and stop it.
I don’t know how to make the policy stronger so I’m reluctant to point out the obvious flaw. I will though, because I’m hoping someone smarter comes up with a legitimate solution and shares it with NAR. The problem with the policy is that overwhelmingly the biggest abuse happens when elected officers of a local association harass their local association staff, usually the Association Executive/CEO.
Imagine that you are the local association CEO and this year’s President is harassing you. Is it worth it to go through the process of reporting that person? Let’s consider that it will likely be the local board of directors that reviews the complaint. Do you like your job? They can’t fire you because you filed. But, what’s the fallout? Wouldn’t it be easier to just wait a year until you don’t have to spend as much time with this person. After all, you can take precautions until then, right?
The above scenario is all too common and disturbing. No policy will work if it doesn’t get used. But still, we really need to figure out a better way.
Moving on. REALTORS in the marketplace often harass each other. It’s my firm belief that many of them truly don’t realize what they are doing. Again, think about it. They’ve likely never had any training other than how they were treated as they were coming of age. As a woman who was a teenager in the late 80’s and entered the workforce in the early 90’s, if I treat others the way I was often treated then I’m harassing and bullying.
That being said, much of it is undeniable. They know. We know. You know. It’s not subtle.
Bullying and harassment in the marketplace can also have an impact on consumers. A buyer’s agent might avoid certain properties because they know they will have to deal with a listing agent that is a bully or is someone who has harassed them previously. A listing agent could present an offer in a less than neutral light if it’s coming from a buyer’s agent that has been abusive in past interactions. The one who is harmed most in these examples is the consumer.
Back to 2019, I suggested that we have Fair Housing and Anti-Harassment education as a condition of membership along with the required Code of Ethics training. At the time, I felt like it all fell on deaf ears. However, NAR recently passed a requirement for Fair Housing education. I’m excited about that positive step. Hopefully, in the very near future, we’ll at least have some optional training on anti-harassment and bullying.
What can we do in the meantime? We can do some online research, watch YouTube videos about it, and be observant. If you see something, say something. Above all else, pay attention to your own actions and words.
This isn’t about someone being easily offended. This is about all of us being better human beings. Why would you intentionally do something that you know will upset another human being? You being a jerk is never for their own good. I know that sometimes we have to be honest with people in ways they don’t like. But, you and I both know that’s not what I’m talking about here.
This is a complicated topic. I know. I also know we’ve been tackling other topics just as tough in the real estate profession. We’re making progress. Don’t stop now!
As always, #BeNoble!
leighyork 